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Self-Doubt on a Love Boat

doubt (noun): a feeling of uncertainty or lack of conviction. (Google.com)

Not long ago, I could drown in the amount of doubt I had.

Last year, doubt was the best word I could find to describe how I felt about everything, but mostly my business.

After working with a friend, Diana, for the past six months, I can confidently say I have been rescued from the sea of doubt that surrounded me. But, I should be more direct in what was plaguing me. Yes, it was doubt. However, self-doubt more accurately describes my issue. 

Hold up. Let me tell you a heartwarming story before I tell you about the metaphorical lifeboat that helped to save me from drowning in doubt.

Rescued by the Love Boat

Last week, my husband and I sailed away on a beautiful cruise ship to visit the Bahamas and the Virgin Islands. The ship we boarded was built with the Love Boat in mind. Yes, the television show.

The horn for the ship blasted the melody for the Love Boat show. It was pretty historical to listen to, even as someone who never watched the Love Boat before.

On the third day of our trip just before lunch, the Captain came over the loudspeaker and announced, “Man overboard. Man overboard.”

Uh, what now?” was my immediate initial response, followed by an unsettling feeling. 

As the Captain continued his announcement, it turned out the man overboard was not from our ship. Instead, we had received a request from the U.S. Coast Guard to go to the last known coordinates of a small plane that crashed into the ocean.

You can say a crazy flood of emotions came over me. And questions started running through my mind (and everyone else’s). Ultimately, the announcement meant we were turning the ship off course and going full speed ahead to where the plane crashed into the ocean a short time before that.

When we arrived at the coordinates, we could see a U.S. Coast Guard airplane circling the ocean looking for signs of the pilot and his co-pilot in the water.

Much to everyone’s surprise and delight, the two individuals we were trying to locate were alive and floating in an orange life raft drifting with the ocean’s current.

The Love Boat’s emergency response team followed through with their training and retrieved the floatation device, complete with two pilots. As the little rescue boat was pulled back up onto the ship, the Captain blared the Love Boat melody to celebrate.

It was the worst day and best day of those pilots!

It was incredible to see the two people who escaped a situation without even a scratch on their body. We knew this because the cruise ship staff interviewed the pilots to share the story of what happened and aired it on the closed circuit television aboard the ship.

The pilots gave their accounts of what happened that day before our ship turned off course on a rescue mission.

The engine of their plane seized at 8,000 feet above the ocean.

You might be wondering, how did they survive an 8,000 foot plummet from the sky into the ocean. Good question!!

Their lives were saved because of the parachute attached to the aircraft that deployed as the plane glided through the sky. As the plane fell closer to the ocean, they ran through their mental checklist of everything that needed to happen to make sure they survived.

After the engine seized, it started with a mayday call. Followed by gathering their survival tools, including the orange floatation device they were found drifting in when our ship arrived.

Once the plane met the water, they made their way to the orange flotation device they threw out the plane’s window. Then, spent two hours adrift waiting to be rescued by the Love Boat.

Side note: Yes, we will be cruising with Princess again in the future as witnessing the whole thing made me that much more confident in training of their employees. Wow!

While the original message by the Captain over the loudspeaker initially instilled a great deal of doubt, I am happy to tell the story about how it all worked out. 

To be more specific, when we were first called by the U. S. Coast Guard, all we knew was a plane crashed into the ocean with their last known coordinates. We didn’t know if the people inside the plane would survive the crash. We didn’t know if they would be able to stay afloat until our ship arrived… With the little information we had, there was a lot of uncertainty (and doubts). 

Yet, the story had the best possible outcome. Those two were rescued and lived to tell about how their plane crashed into the ocean. It’s a pretty incredible when you think about everything that happened! 

Side note, if you don’t believe me, here is a link to a news article about the events that transpired that day. And, no. I didn’t take any pictures. The Captain asked that we respect the privacy of the individual’s in the water and the crew as they did their jobs. My husband and I obliged. 

Back to Self-Doubt

So, while these people had a literal boat rescue them. I, on the other hand, had a metaphorical boat save me from the tremendous amount of self-doubt I was drowning in 2019.

One of the emergency response team members for my rescue boat was a good friend of mine, Diana. I think I will refer to her as the Captain of my rescue boat. Her knowledge and words of wisdom have helped me to find direction in life. And, see the world around me in a very different light. 

More importantly, Diana has taught me to change my perspective of… myself. This meant I was my own rescue boat saving myself from drowning in a sea of self-doubt. Of course, there were a few emergency team members to assist in the process, with Diana at the helm. 

Here’s My Rescue Plan from Self-Doubt

My rescue from self-doubt started by questioning the stories I had been telling about myself, my business, and the world around.

  • Were the things I was thinking and believing actually true?
  • Or, were they just fictional stories I had created to make myself feel better about what I was doing? Hint: Many of the stories were not actually true.  

As a result of this questioning, I needed to learn to let go of the stories that were no longer serving me. For example, when I would say that I needed to be in business for at least three years before I could have successful business. Well, that was not really true. It was a story I told myself as to why my business was not raking in large amounts of money – in my first year of business.

Instead, I had been holding myself back with the desire to make everything perfect – and I was unable to reach that level of perfection. So, my engine seized essentially due to paralysis by perfectionism. I needed to learn to let go of my perfectionistic ways to move forward. And, ditch the story I had been telling myself that my business wouldn’t be successful for at least three years.

Through changing the stories I had been telling myself, I was able to let go of my doubt. In the process, I found comfort in trust

  • trust (noun): firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something. (Google.com)

Ultimately, I have learned to trust myself more and not rely on what other people say I need to do. Oh, and I needed to believe in myself! I have become more confident in the direction I am moving within my business (and life) as a result of trusting and believing in myself.

If that last paragraph didn’t seem like a profound statement to you, it might be a good idea to re-read it. Seriously.That was a pretty powerful realization. I hope you are able to come to a similar realization for yourself. 

Has this Been an Easy Process?

Not exactly. It has required me to dig deep and answer some tough questions. But, in doing this work, I have found my true self. {A topic we will revisit at a later date} And, the love I feel by embracing my true self as an asset, not a liability, is fantastic! 

This isn’t exactly the place I want to tell you all about my past, but I will tell you I have had quite a history of anxiety over the past 15+ years. I distinctly remember standing outside of a classroom in college. I asked my instructor about an unsettling feeling I had in my stomach.

Before I finished describing the feeling she told me I was likely experiencing GI upset from stress. The conversation from there shifted to stress and anxiety. While I wasn’t fully aware of my stress or anxiety at a conscious level, it realized it was definitely a thing as I reflected on everything going on in my life at the time.

I wish I could say I squashed the stress bug that was causing my GI distress that day. But, that did not happen. Instead, that stress bug continued to multiple and grow. Yea, pretty much the last 15 years…

15 years of Stress and Anxiety 

It wasn’t until I met Diana that I learned how to take back my control — and ditch the stress and anxiety (well, at least most of it).

This meant letting go of my self-doubt and employing trust instead. Diana, as the Captain of my rescue boat, has helped me to enact the tools required to make this happen.

While I’d love to tell you I have this all figured out, and I am cured of all my self-doubt, that would be an elaborate lie. It is simply not true. There are moments that my self-doubt seeps back into the lifeboat, but I have learned how to spot it before it consumes me (and my boat).

Other times, the return of my self-doubt feels like a raft taking on water more quickly than the Titanic after hitting the iceberg. Let’s say it’s a process and some days are better than others, but I have made significant improvement from the way I felt back in 2019.

What Have You Done to Overcome the Doubt?

One way Diana has helped me to ditch my self-doubt was to teach me about the Law of Attraction. This may seem corny but bear with me.

Do you remember the book (or movie) in the early 2000s called The Secret? It described the Law of attraction. 

The Law of Attraction is the concept that what we think, believe, and feel will happen in real life. In other words, our thoughts become things. When we imagine what we want in the future, and then actualize that vision, it is the Law of Attraction in full effect.

Now, some people have a hard time believing thoughts can become things. I get it. It sounds a little ridiculous when you first hear about it. But, I promise, it is a legit thing.

Your current disbelief in the process may stem from the fact you have dreamed about some things you’d like in your life, but they have not materialized. Right? 

Perhaps you want to build a successful business, but you have had a hard time making your dreams become your reality.

Well, this is likely not the case as a result of a few things, such as doubt and lack of trust. But, it can also be because you have been focusing on the wrong things in your life. For example, let’s say you want to get out of debt. So, you focus on being “debt-free.” However, this concept of debt-free still focuses on debt. Instead, the focus should be on abundance.

If you are focused on being debt-free when we apply the Law of Attraction principles, the wealth you seek will not happen because your attention is on the wrong thing – debt. It needs to be on abundance! 

This is the type of thing Diana has helped me to enact in my life to successfully deploy my lifeboat. And, that has helped me to feel as though I have been rescued from that sea of self-doubt. In other words, I’ve learned to focus my attention on what I do want in life to put the Law of Attraction into practice. 

How Does this Relate to You? 

Well, I sincerely hope you are living in a place of trust and have ditched the life of self-doubt. 

But, if that is not the case, and I get the feeling that doubt might be present considering you are still reading this right now. I’ve got some questions for you to ponder:

– When you feel as though you must do something a specific way, where does that belief come from? Is it something you were told? Or, was it something you decided yourself? Don’t accept the surface level answer either. Dig deeper.

 

Thank You

Cheers to the Love Boat for rescuing those two pilots. And, thank you to Diana for helping me to realize I have what it takes within myself and allowing me to move past the sea of self-doubt.

I hope you are able to start down a path to uncover the similar truths for yourself. 

XOXO Kristi 

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